Exposé of little old me!

Yes! I'm important enough to be hated by radfems! And targeted by them! And have a whole blog dedicated to discrediting me!

I feel like such a success!

[ETA: the blog they point to has had, according to SiteMeter, zero hits from Snowdrop Exposed in the last 3 months - in fact, it's had more hits from this post than from their blog!]

According to the oh-so-wittily-titled "Snowdrop Exposed!", I am a danger to women everywhere! Even though I can't afford an air fare, and haven't even got a passport! With My black magical powers... (oh, wait, I'm a Christian, I'm not supposed to use magic...) With My evil technological genius powers... (darn it, why won't my computer work properly?) Erm... with my amazing ability to control people's minds with just typing words on the page (except how come I'm totally unable to convince people of my arguments?)... Okay, you got me - I can't affect anyone who's not in the UK, and honestly, if you're more than 10 miles from where I live, you're probably safe!

And in fact, because I am self-aware enough to have been able to write the post that has these radfems all hot under the collar, I'm probably safer than the majority of humans, despite also being rather violent in personality.

Anyway, to business! I chose to write this to debunk a few of the (being generous!) misinterpretations about a very dark and disturbing post I wrote about a real-life event. I'll quote their warning, since it is apt: "if you are triggered by rape scenarios, please do NOT read on." Or click on the following link:

A Confession -NSFW, and DO NOT READ IF TRIGGERED BY RAPE SCENARIOS

Here are the comments I left over there:

Firstly, I want to point out that your "almost raped and murdered" introduction fails to make it clear (as I did in my post) that the woman in question was never touched or harmed in any way, and indeed probably never knew and doesn't know, that she was in any danger from me. For that, let us be thankful.

Now, I would like to address a few points where I believe I may have been misunderstood:

SE’s brand of feminism is not in line with what is best for females, but always, without fail, must contain benefit for males.

This is not what I have said. It is a definition of what I call "manefism", which makes me an ally to feminism but not a feminist. I identify as a feminist because I want to see the world a better place for women. I identify as a feminist ally because I believe that the success of feminism will make the world a better place for men.

Indeed, the one of the first things apparent in The Confession above is how the whole scenario would have affected him (and his soul) forever and ever. There is nowhere any real concern, other than secondarily, of the woman’s life/feelings/family, only of his “eternal soul”."

Once again, you have misread my original post. The apparent lack of concern for others is described clearly, because that was a symptom of my depressive state. I was simply describing clearly for my reader what my mental state was at the time of the incident. It is not the way I feel about the event now (as if it was, I wouldn't see any point in sharing the experience at all). If it makes any difference, yes, I'm glad I haven't killed anyone because it means that anyone I might have killed is instead living and breathing and unharmed. Happy now?

Furthermore, his act was not a spontaneous one, it was planned and equipped for, over a period of time.

Clearly, the cathartic (therapeutic) release did NOT work at all.

This is, again, a misunderstanding. My reasoning behind claiming that having watched the death-fetish movie is as follows (incidentally, you are right to assume it was staged and not real - the website it originated on has several different videos showing the victim dying in several different ways - I think it is important to draw a distinction between "snuff", which is where the victim actually did die, and "death fetish porn" where the victim only pretends to die):

• I had masturbated to orgasm; non-violent or non-BDSM porn would not have achieved this effect for me. (Incidentally, the claim that I would have to watch a film every hour is utterly unsupported by my statements; and this line of reasoning shows that it would be much less frequent than that, unless you think that male sexual desire and performance resets much more quickly than it ever has for me!)
• Therefore I was exhausted sexually, and less interested at that time in sex than I would have been had my sexual energy not been released in that manner.
• Therefore, when I had the opportunity to carry out an attack that, as you say, I had planned for over a period of time, I did not take the opportunity. I believe that I would have done so had I not had that release.
• Therefore, a woman's life was saved by violent porn.

The "therapeutic release" argument stands as a separate issue. Since you will no doubt claim that obviously in my case it was failing over a long period of time, I will reply to that argument by pointing out that the associated guilt that modern society places on these types of release can be counter-productive. Especially when coupled with clinical depression.

From whence did these urges spring? If the pro-pornography activists argue that cathartic release is one of the main benefits of pornography, then that can only argue that urges to rape and murder are already within and need release. That really does not say a lot for the calibre of pro-pornography activist — that they are raping/murdering scum and need an outlet or else they unleash their true selves on the innocent population(!)

I explained precisely where my urge to rape came from, and I agree that, no, it does not cast me in a good light - I am a flawed human being, but I do not deny my flaws. Here is what I said: "When I feel suicidal, it takes the form of destroying the world around me rather than destroying myself... the firm belief that my depression gave me, that I could never find a willing [sexual] partner." I admit that this displays a sense of male entitlement to women's bodies, something that I have hopefully largely unlearned in recent years. I am not making a defence of myself here, I am just making my motivations clearer. To be even clearer still about what I described, I note you say, "Radical feminists (”RFs”) rarely take this view, that ‘raping/murdering scum’ need an outlet or else they turn on the innocent population. Instead they view that although there may be a tiny percentage of the population who are incapable of telling right-from-wrong..." Well, as I tried to explain in my OP, because of my depression, I was one of that tiny percentage, at the time of the incident. That is why I said in my OP that, had I described any of this to a medical practitioner, then I would have been locked up under the Mental Health Act (1984) for the protection of myself and others!

Bringing this back around to BDSM, a self-confessed practitioner of BDSM (”a Dom”) who maintains he is not his normal self (in severe depression) merely attempts to act out a further of his BDSM “play” or games. Not less, not opposite, but further along the continuum.

Now, I searched in vain for any point where I claimed that my desire to rape and murder were a "continuation" of BDSM play or "games". That is because I never said it. And I never said it, because it just isn't true. Which makes the rest of your argument somewhat of a canard. BDSM is different from rape, because BDSM is CONSENSUAL, and ENJOYED BY BOTH PARTIES. Describing it as "subjugation of another person to satisfy one’s own needs" is completely mendacious and misguided. There is no continuum between BDSM and rape or murder. There just isn't.

***

Oh yes, a couple more points:

You seem offended that I posted with the intention of helping to stop others from committing murder and rape. Apparently it slipped your attention that that meant I posted hoping to make sure that women don't get raped and murdered!

Secondly, you might want to read a follow-up post, prompted by someone who approached these issues with a lot more respect than you have.

Interview with a sadist (link NSFW)

Finally, there is zero chance that I will ever remove the post in question (What? Did you think I would act like a coward and hide from the truth, because you seek to use it to discredit me?) The post will stand because I hope and believe it can help reduce the number of rapes and murders committed by desperate and emotionally disturbed young men.